I’ve never been more amazed by spring than this year. 

The buds that are getting ready to burst, the bright blooms coming out of the ground, the birds chirping and nesting all around us. How can still want to make their way into the world, with all that is happening, now?  

This world, with all of its violence, hatred, seeking of power-over, and disregard for human life (yes the idea of overturning Roe V. Wade is disregard for human life imo) and well being. It’s like the people in power are not only not even trying to use their prefrontal cortexes anymore, but they simply can’t, or won’t. 

How could these innocent, beautiful, vibrant forms of life want to take any part in this shit show?

I also look at my children, and their friends, and all these bright, beautiful, curious kids who have no idea how disturbed and warped things are getting.  I look at my husband who is so loving and funny and thoughtful, and my friends who care so deeply about this world and the life it supports as well.  

There is so much that inspires me and makes me want to be here and care so deeply about this place.

Has it always been this enormous of a paradox?  It seems like the gap is bigger every day.

Despite everything that deeply troubles me around this globe, I continue to believe that my mothering, my partnership, and my family is the place I can have the most impact.  Not only do I feel the most gratified of all the areas of my life by these relationships, but I think that if our homes and families can function in ways that are fair, loving, and mutual, even under stress, then surely we can extend this experience beyond our families—into our communities, and then into the larger world.

My deep attachments to my kids and husband are anchors for me in this current chaos.  Our family is a total refuge of love, hope, and connection for me.  We have worked hard to make it so, and I had no idea how much that would serve us already.

I know we all need anchoring right now—we need safe, loving, comforting places to breathe and feel and express ourselves, and to sort through our feelings, the choices we have, and the actions we want to take.  My hope is that whoever your loved ones are, that those relationships are that for you.  We cannot do this alone, we surely must do this together, even if doing this means somehow staying the course in fighting for our basic human rights—that no one should be having to fight for.

Love your people, take good care of your people, we will all be better for it.  And may we have the strength, stamina, and vision to move beyond all of this into a world we can actually safely and sanely inhabit.

The blue jays are doing it, and I’m taking notes.